Merry Christmas!

I am sure this post will be very random so I apologize in advance.

Writer's block...blogger's block...whatever you want to call it, that is what I have been experiencing. Being Christmas and the mission approaching (4 months, now down to 11 days, WHAT??) I have run out of time for any blogging and haven't thought much of it, I will be honest.

When I have heard people say their heart is full whether it is of gratitude, happiness, joy or love…
I haven’t been able to fully understand them…until now.

At least I think so.
These past five months I have been going through this sort of process. Experiencing every emotion you could possibly think of and I am not sure how I feel about it. Yeah, I have learned a lot from it but come on who wants to feel super confident about something and then two days later feel completely inadequate? I have never been the emotional one or the sensitive one so this really took me by surprise and I wasn’t ready for it, no one ever is. Now, as I sit here I can’t think of a better word to express how I feel than full.

Full of gratitude, happiness, joy and LOVE.

The sort of feelings that are fought for and sought after, often disappointingly we are left with something short of these things.

But not me, not today…

I am holding on to these things.

They are what will sustain me for the next eighteen crazy months of my life.

Every year, our family writes personal letters to Jesus as our gift to Him until the next Christmas. As I read last year’s letter, I realized I had given the gifts that I promised. But I had done this in a completely different way than I expected. That is such a cool thing. It doesn’t matter how well I plan my life or how diligently I strive to achieve things, if I am giving all I have the Lord makes up the difference. Often times we accomplish things in a much different way than expected but it is usually even better than we could have imagined. We THINK we know our potential, but we have no idea. This would be one of the many lessons that I have learned in the past months. I don’t mean to sound preachy, so if I am, feel free to stop reading. I am just so happy. I think I have figured out why.

One evening in March, I was sitting in the kitchen surrounded by some of the most wonderful young women I have ever met. Every Sunday night we would have a devotional, to bring our thoughts back to what our purpose really was there in Ecuador. That is when I heard this quote. I am sure you have heard it or read it before on my blog. I'm “recharged” when I read this. How wonderful would it be to become this? What if this was my focus before anything else? I feel that if I keep this as my goal everything else I want to do will follow and will be better than I could have ever imagined. I hope it is okay if I share it with you once more.

I AM A PART of the Fellowship of the Unashamed.The die has been cast.
The decision has been made.
I have stepped over the line.
I won´t look back, let up, slow down, back away or be still.

My past is redeemed,
my present makes sense,
and my future is in God´s hands.
I am finished and done with low living,
sight walking, small planning, the bare minimum, smooth knees, colorless dreams, tamed visions, mundane talking,frivolous living, selfish giving, and dwarfed goals.

I no longer need preeminence, prosperity, position, promotions, applause, or popularity.
I don´t have to be right, first, the best, recognized, praised, regarded, or rewarded.

I now liveby faith.
I lean on Christ´s presence.
I love with patience, live by prayer, and labor with thepower of God´s grace.
My face is set. My gait is fast, my goal is heaven.
My road is narrow, my way is rough, my companions are few, my Guide is reliable, and my mission is clear.

I cannot be bought, compromised, detoured, lured away, turned back, deluded, or delayed.

I will not flinch in the face of sacrifice,
hesitate in the presence of adversity,
negotiate at the table of the enemy,
ponder at the pool of popularity,
or meander in the maze of mediocrity.

I won’t give up, shut up, let up or slow up until I have stayed up, stored up, prayed up, paid up, and spoken up for the cause of Christ.

I am a disciple of Jesus.

I must go till He comes, give until I drop, speak out until all know,and work until He stops me.
And when He returns for His own, He will have no difficulty recognizing me.

My banner is CLEAR.

-Anonymous

This is random yes but it is how Christmas should be! Oh so joyful.

Feliz Navidad!!